Penis Envy, Type A Personality, and Genetics

Freud, though obsolete in today's understanding of the mind, is quite an interesting character. I never considered the idea of penis envy. When I was a kid, I really had no concept of a penis, not until I reached my early teens. I knew about genitalia as a means for urination, but I never considered a man's genitals, his sexual prowess, so how could I have penis envy in my childhood? I didn't find out about the concept of sex until I was thirteen when my cousins told me. I thought it was the most hilarious thing on the planet. Even today I don't take sex seriously. I am ashamed of it and still laugh at the thought, wondering if sex is just God's joke for the entire human race.

I had quite a sheltered upbringing, one full of misguided care however. When I think of Freud, I wonder about all the weird fetishes and preferences I have. I wonder if Freud can explain why I like weak, effeminate men. And why I am such a control freak. Did this all begin in one of his stages like the phallic stage or anal stage?

I am the most anal-retentive person I know, and it depresses me. Are Mom and Dad to blame because of faulty potty-training? Or did I inherit this trait through my genes? It's very easy to blame genetics and far more complicated to blame environment. It ends with genes, easy as pie, but where does it end with upbringing and social influences?

I still rely more on genetics, because I feel like there are intrinsic parts of me that no one has power over, not even me. I was born this way and no one can change that, though I still give some credit to Freud.

There are so many theories in psychology and they all seem pitted against each other. There're Cognitive and Humanist and so on. I like to take a little from each and form my own picture. I like Freud most, because of his outlandish claims and his fixation on sex.

I don't want to stereotype genders, but I'm pretty sure crazy sex is not number one on women's minds, probably not even in the top ten. If Freud were a woman, I wonder what the Psychoanalytic Theory would be like with all its alterations, if it would materialize at all. And could there ever be a Mother of Psychology? It would make more sense, since women are the child-bearing sex and the greatest creators of humankind.