Plato, Aristotle, and Longinus readings

I finally read the first week's readings which was the majority of Classical Literary Criticism. The book is very dense and laden, precluding me from absorbing all parts. Because of the enormity of passages, I lost track here and there, but caught glimpses of truth and wisdom when my mind suddenly focused amidst the blur.

I clearly recall the many distinctions between great and lowly men, effective poets and clowns. There were so many obscure names being dropped here and there--perhaps the equivalent to rock stars in their day.

The problem, the reason I lost focused, is like I mentioned earlier, I don't see the relevance. Sure there are the great truths, the great strengths, nobilities, and follies of man, but really, events and thought thousands of years ago are not going to prevail today.

Sure the human condition transcends space and time, but society, the sign of the times, has its reign.

Maybe good ol' sexy Plato and Aristotle captured the hearts of men and women in their heyday, but they do nothing for me. And really, what does it all matter? Do philosophy and disseminating grandiloquent ideas really contribute to the condition of man? Do they end all wars and fill the universe with love and harmony? Do they do anything, but sit pretty in the tirades of man? Are they nothing but decor of thought, separating scholars from laymen?

My gods, my muses, my great philsophers are my contempories: rock stars, movie stars, reality show contestants (yes, really), athletes, and dear profs.

All these music videos I posted don't give me wisdom directly (the lyrics can be quite corny), but they set the stage for great thought. They are the background to all my dialogues and preachings to myself, to every story I've ever written, to every fantasy I've ever had, to every paradise I stepped into.

I love idolizing men, particularly rock stars. They are removed from my reality, yet they are still real. I love them, not for their outstanding talents and attributes, but for the reason that they are like dress-up dolls. I dress them any way I please. They are mine to dictate, they are my creations.

Once I realize the reality of my human condition, I feel disgusted. I want romance, rainbows, waterfalls, lullabies, Hawaiian rain. I don't want a man who's going to piss me off and cheat on me. I want a perfect man, and that is exactly what an idol is.

An idol has nothing to do with the person idolized. An idol is an extension of my desires and dreams. An idol is me alone. So I do not love the actual Pat Monahan, Raine Maida, and Charles Kelley. I love how I've painted them--how many realities removed?

I don't believe in human endeavors to be great. I don't believe in greatness at all. Who are we to be great? Who are we to rule the universe? Who are we to be remembered? In the end, we will be expunged and forgotten, if best repainted ghouls.

It is not reality that matters, the layout of time and events. What matters is our artistry, our depiction of a far distant place and time, a far distant mind. I believe that reality does nothing but contribute ill will and ill health and much grueling unhappiness. I believe our imagination is our greatest solace, our greatest outlet, our biggest means of enduring tragedy and moving past the scars and tears.

I am fine being small. I have resigned myself to mediocrity, poverty, and obscurity. My dreams of leaving behind any mark have faded into dreams of escaping the world for periods where I am queen.

Life can only be beautiful if we stop seeing the world in its natural depravity. Life is beautiful, because it allows our hearts to travel to other lives even more radiant. Life keeps us from being content, it keeps us passionate and battling and flailing, and it is hell. I am an optimist--this is the worst it's ever gonna get. We live in hell with portals to a world one day we may possess. And I'm hoping to stop dwelling and believing and wishing and hoping. I'm hoping to be in my dream world without the concept of dreams. Emotions are hell. In an ideal world, we'll just be. It's so simple. And that's heaven.